I has green hair now :3 (I just woke up)
I was at the mall today and overheard this dude talking to two lesbian chicks. I hear him ask, “So which one of you is the guy in your relationship?” And the one girl looks into her pants and says, “It’s not me. How bout you? Are you hiding a dick in there?” Then her girlfriend looks in her pants and says, “Nope, I’m not.” Then the first chick looks at the dude and says, “Hmmm, guess that’s why we are lesbians.” And then I lost my shit.
man every time i rewatch captain america i’m like. so inspired by dr. erskine. what a dude. bleeding out in steve rogers’ arms and his final act before dying is to go in for a last second boob touch. like, the dude saw his window of opportunity closing and he snatched it. not gonna see pecs like those in a shirt that tight in the afterlife. gotta make every minute on earth count.